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Zombies Edited

We're on course for soft-Brexit zombie land

John Longworth
February 2, 2018

Our nation is heading for a zombie land named BRINO ("Brexit in Name Only"). It is a land inhabited not by flesh eating Zombies but by initiative consuming Eurocrats, the antithesis of free enterprise and innovation, explains John Longworth, Co-Chairman of Leave Means Leave. 

Unfortunately, those upon whom we ought to be able to rely to save us have been bitten by the Euro bug. Our Chancellor, Philip Hammond is an organ of the Euro-loving, often foreign-owned, multinationals who care not for our country but only for how much of it they can consume. The Chancellor is backed by the undead of the Treasury, who worship at the altar of our out of date and ill-informed "economic gravity  models", reinforcing the oft-repeated chant; "Leave spells economic disaster!" Clearly, they cannot spell.

The Great Zombie herself, set the course for Zombie land in that magical place, Fierenze, when She offered up heart and soul, Gold and shackles, to maintain her place at the feet of High Priestess of the Euro religion, Merkel.

But Merkel wants more. To shackle Britannia still further, with ball and chain, lest we run ahead and others follow. To cut out our ability to control our borders, our laws and our money. Above all, to see to it that we are worse off.

Our leaders are prepared to acquiesce to this in order to keep their seats at the front of the great talking shop.

The Organ of the multinationals is mesmerised by the hypnotic effect of the status quo and fear of the new and exciting. A "bean counter" controlled by the overweening money men, who have a passport to represent less than one percent of the economy, but want to remain nestled in the bosom of the High Priestess. The elixir on which he is fed is provided by the chief troglodytes; the one who Robs the people of their inheritance and the one who makes Hey in the wood, an elixir mixed by the undead of the Treasury.

The Great Zombie will soon scribe in blood, to consign her clan to a secret pact of three years and beyond of servitude to the wizard of Gaul, who lives in a Barn, and to the High Priestess. For the privilege of this her clan will pay high taxes and forego all of their newly won political and economic freedoms, in order to be poorer and provide an example to the others already working in the Teutonic Salt Mines throughout the lands across the southern sea.

Is there any hope?

Britannia can only call upon a hero (or heroine) to smite the flesh eaters and free the people. Could it be the blond Thor? Or the wily Gollum? Will it be the wise and stripy Kingmaker? Or a new hero yet to emerge.

As the great clock ticks, has the time come for the forty-eight and a hero?

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John Longworth is Chairman of the Independent Business Network of family businesses, an entrepreneur and businessman. He was formerly DG of the British Chambers of Commerce and a Conservative MEP.
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